for ladies only

dearest female readers,

forgive me for being a tad indelicate, but may i humbly suggest that you might want to consider not masturbating on video for your boyfriend.

it’s not that the legions of us who aren’t your boyfriend don’t appreciate your efforts – we do, we do and… we do – but i’ll warrant that most of you didn’t set out to be quite so generous when exposing your feminine charms to camera…

since no males are reading this, i will temporarily let down the side and advise you that perhaps, just perhaps, that strapping buck pumping his seed into you day in, day out may in fact turn out to not be your eternal soulmate.

please, just provide for the possibility.

and should that prove the case, then almost invariably you should be prepared for your intimate ‘for your eyes only’ to suddenly and enthusiastically receive exceptionally wide distribution.

i know there are many of you who have already ridden this train. you’re hurt. you’re angry. you’re humiliated. you don’t know where to turn.

well, i say wear that red badge with honour and show that nasty ex what they’re missing. come join the explosion of empowered sisters who are doing it for themselves in every which way and with shameless abandon.

you could take it to its narcissistic natural conclusion with a video blog featuring increasingly inventive ways to get yourself off (and whatever else), and at the same time teach ‘him’ the lesson he so richly deserves.

in the process, you will discover more than enough sympathy and support from the online community, your real friends and paramours.

and while you’re at it, why not upgrade your equipment for a truly professional look (here is a good unit and a deal to boot!).

who knows? it could evolve into that career in pornography you were always meant for. remember, the world is your oyster.

7 Responses to “for ladies only”

  1. Sister

    You bastard. You absolute bastard.

  2. bobo


  3. Dr. Luv

    Please, Sister… Someone has to take the matter in hand.

  4. Jack O.

    you conniving media whore. a few silly words on girlfriend porn with a link to amazon. what kind of animal are you?

  5. bobo

    a silly one.

  6. Pennywise

    suck eggs bobo

  7. bobo

    as long as they’re quail.

Comments are closed.